The only thing I remember vividly was fighting so hard to free myself from the beast, the liar and the perpetrator! I fought with all my strength. He held me so tightly…I could not breathe.

amacares pic

My eyes were filled with tears. I was suddenly gasping for air. My frail body was pleading for help. My voice was shaking. I gathered all the strength I could find and cried out so loudly but no one seemed to hear me. The mere thought of the pain and loneliness surrounding that incident sends shivers down my spine!

On that fateful day, the perpetrator who was supposed to protect me suggested we go out for meal. This was someone well respected by the family. Someone I trusted so much. I never entertained the thought that he could harm me. He told me to feel at home. He emphasized on the fact that I had nothing to worry about. Little did I know that I was actually the PREY.

After that day, my world was shuttered. My life seemed to be filled solely with pain and shame. Sometimes I will blame myself. Tears behind closed doors were the order of the day. Fear became my partner although I was a lady well admired by many. A confident, beautiful and friendly lady was the person I was. Nothing shook my world as hard as that day. The day the beast came to destroy me! I was afraid to speak about it. I covered it all up with my beautiful make-up, the expensive clothes and the beautiful hairstyles. The cover up really worked.

The abuse was tearing my world apart. But guess what? I eventually found courage and confidence and broke the silence. Not only have I become whole but I have also become a VOICE to many victims. My life is now whole. The broken ME have now become WHOLE. I am mentally FREE!

Studies prove that women, in particular, feel shame, because they are often blamed for being sexually abused. Even today, women are accused of causing their own victimization with comments like, “what did she expect when she dresses like she does?”

Ladies what would you prefer? A life that is whole, free of pain, free of fear, free of depression or you‘ll rather be silent about the ABUSE.

You are a GEM. You are CONFIDENT and BEAUTIFUL. You are COURAGEOUS. You can do this. You can also get your life back. Let’s rise up and make a difference. Your VOICES really count. Together we can make a difference.

#speakout

#stopsexualabuse

#MeToo

 

Author: amacares

Many women are sexually abused daily and are not able to speak about it. AmaCares is a project which helps to empower women, provide support and counselling.

4 thoughts on “The only thing I remember vividly was fighting so hard to free myself from the beast, the liar and the perpetrator! I fought with all my strength. He held me so tightly…I could not breathe.”

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